stephanie the great: loneliness is a disease

For the past two weeks, I've been getting up at 5:30 am to take bart out to Pleasanton in order to be at my sister's house by seven. See, my sister and her roommate have a lady from their church (they're Mormon) watching their collective five children, but she wasnt responsible or on top of things at all. So while they look for a daycare service, I agreed to babysit an elleven year old, two nine year olds, a six year old, and a three year old from 7:00 am to 7:00 pm. It's entirely exhuasting.

But thats not the worst part; I hardly see my mom or roommates or anyone I'm used to seeing multiple times a day. The kids arent very good company, my sister's at work all day, and my absolute best friend who lives in Dublin that I NEVERRR get to see isnt allowed to come over. I'm dreadfully, monstrously, unequivocally lonely. And even when I make it home at eight something, my mum's still at work. I know she has to work long, hard hours to support our family and household, but I still miss her.

To top it all off, I am in near-constant pain. My migraines are getting progressively worse and they keep lasting for longer periods of time, sometimes weeks. I feel dizzy half the time. My chest hurts, as in my heart, and I'm way too young to be experiencing that. I have an appointment on Wednesday to see my doctor, so she can give me a refferal to a neurologist, sleep doctor, allergy doctor, chiropractor, cardiologist, and about a thousand other doctors. Hopefully one of them will figure it out. My mom says its possible I could have fibromyalgia, which is scary/:

Aaaanyways, I just got a whole bunch of clothes/shoes/accessories and I've only posted pictures of the first third of my fashion haul. My camera connector cord is at home, and I still have to take pictures of most of the stuff. I'll try to get some of them up tonight or tomorrow, but for now here's some things I'm hoping to get in within the next couple shopping trips: